Pull Your Brain Out Ya' Pants

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When we talk about erogenous zones, most would think about what’s below the belt. But the first thing that comes to my mind is, well, my mind. That’s right, the brain is actually the largest erogenous zone in the body. 

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Why, you ask? Let’s break it down. 

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Erogenous comes from the Greek word eros, meaning love of a sexual nature, and genous, to produce. We often associate sensitive areas with a lot of pleasure- the nipples, genitals, lips of the mouth, nape of the neck, and upper thighs are some common erogenous zones. None of these, however, would feel quite so good without a brain. In essence, we need our brain to produce the sensation of pleasure in all these sensitive areas. 

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It begins in the ventromedial prefrontal cortex (vmPFC). This is where stimulus is recognized and gets categorized through the limbic system (hypothalamus, amygdala, and hippocampus) where emotional response, memory and arousal are produced. 

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Within the limbic system, the hypothalamus regulates the nervous system through a series of hormone production and release. This works on autonomic bodily functions including breathing and blood pressure, while also coordinating desires around hunger, thirst, and sexual arousal.  

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The amygdala works to process our emotional response to incoming stimulus, which elicits our turn ons and our turn offs. As the amygdala processes emotions on both present experiences and to memories, it will determine what is worth remembering. Because our response to pleasure and pain occur here, the amygdala is what gives us motivation to take action towards or against something and may be the antagonist behind thrill-seeking and risky behaviors.

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The vmPFC is connected to the nervous system which runs throughout the entire body, connecting to all five senses . This connection is why in certain states of mind sensation can seem overwhelming. Because your brain is connected to the rest of your body, there is a rhythmic dance happening at all times, constantly recognizing and responding to stimulus. 

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So, the seat of desire does not lie in your loins, but between your ears. Knowing that the pleasure or disgust of a sensation begins here helps to pull the focus away from the genitals and instead into anything that feels good. It is less about friction and more about curiosity. 

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Curiosity pulls us towards satisfaction, excitement, and adventure. It takes the pressure off of being “satisfied” and turns into an exploration of all things juicy. Passion and desire do not happen automatically, even though much of our education tells us otherwise. However, both John Gottman and Esta Perell, two of America’s leading relationship psychologists, agree that pleasure begins in the brain with the right context. 

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So the best strategy for stimulating the most important erogenous zone?

Sustain your curiosity. Be intrigued throughout the day. Allow yourself to explore possibility as a means of expanding into pleasure.

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